The “Not Diet” Diet

I’ve been trying to give up the concept of dieting all year. And what have I lost? Not weight, that’s for sure. I’m constantly thinking about how I WANT to eat, but SHOULDN’T. And all for what? To fit in a smaller size of pants and weight a smaller number on the scale. I suppose it’s the way women are.

Then last night I was watching old episodes of the original 90210. And I compare the girls on that show, icons of beauty and fashion at the time, to the girls on the new version of 90210. The girls on the original series were beautiful, often bikini-clad and midriffs bare, but definitely much “heavier” than the girls on the new 90210. I don’t remember actresses taking such a drastic change in weight, but realized if someone were to compare the two, the girls on the original episode would be considered fat. Yes, I said it. And it hurts me. Because they weren’t fat. And the girls on the new shows look sickly thin in comparison.

Now, I’m not hating on anyone, concepts of who’s healthier or what’s “in season” for fashion. If you remember, Jennifer Anniston was heavier on her first seasons of Friends. The Rachel we all loved with her Rachel hairdo. And the later seasons (“the Brad years” as I like to call them) she’s much thinner. If I remember right, she lost her weight through pilates and The Zone. Same thing with stars like Hillary Duff, who I thought looked great at their original weight.

But I’ve digressed and don’t know why I started there to begin with. Other than today I’m reading an article about Green Mountain at Fox Run, a camp where women are trained to stop associating shame and guilt with food, but instead remove the restrictions and emotions from eating, realize healthy foods taste good too, and learn how to distinguish hunger from other emotions. And they say as women remove the restrictions of some of the foods, specifically guilty with eating them, they naturally start to eat healthier. Sounds like exactly what I need. Mostly I need to figure out how not to feel ashamed when I eat a burger and fries. And how to tell real hunger from emotions. Mostly I eat out of emotions. And eat mindlessly.

As I read through the description of the camp (I’m calling it a camp because I’m not sure what else to call it), and look at a descrption of a sample week, I start to wish I had the money to do something like this. I definitely know what’s healthy and what’s not. And moreso, I exercise fairly regularly. But I feel like taking the time to focus solely on my health and my attitude about eating (and getting over the feeling that I have to deprive to be healthy (healthy = skinny here) might benefit me. Plus, it would be nice to go into a workout or a cooking class and not feel judged. Because, let’s face it, heavy people are judged as a bunch of things they usually aren’t. I won’t even list off the things I’ve been told. I leave the site of the camp feeling refreshed and click on the links to see what other readers are saying.

And boom.

Feeling killed.

A bunch of haters talking about people needing to go on a diet. About not giving fat people self esteem because they should be ashamed that they’re fat and get thin out of sheer will.

First of all, do you think anyone LIKES being overweight? I’m here to tell you, no one does. And it’s failed diets that make us occasionally throw up our hands. Or, in my case, continue working out for nine months to lose about 10 pounds. That’s no fun. And meanwhile girls who I watch eat two and three and four times as much as me, celebrate because they “made it to the gym twice in the same week!” while I’m working out 45 minutes to an hour and a half  five or six times a week. Is it fair? No. Life’s not fair. But it is frustrating to watch some do things so effortlessly while others struggle with it. Then a company like this one helps women work on accepting their bodies, and taking it one step at a time, is degrated. Some say that it’s not good to help us get self esteem. Others say this camp is detrimental to overall health.

I’m sorry, but any improvement is improvement. And some people struggle with their weight more than others. Just like some struggle to do math. And others struggle to solve problems. Everyone’s given blessings in this life. And rather than juding each other, we should support each other on the journey to being the best person we can be.


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. jennewby71
    Aug 01, 2011 @ 17:31:03

    Great post!
    I TOTALLY agree about the New 90210 girls. matter of fact i watched just a couple episodes when it very first aired and that is why I didn’t watch more. The girls on that show are anorexic thin and totally disgusting. i couldn’t stand to watch that portraying what a high school student looks like. I’m now actually watching all the old Ally McBeal episodes and seeing how extremely thin those actresses were too. Although Calista Flockhart and Courtney Thorne Smith have both now admitted that during those years they did have eating disorders. Calista not admitting to a “disorder” just that she was working so much and stressed and no time to eat. But anyway, I hate seeing such thin actors on TV because I think it really sends the wrong message.


  2. Trackback: GMAFR – Day 2 « Stumbling Toward Health

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