Adrenal and Attitude Healing – Progress Comes Slowly But Is Worth The Ride

I feel like I roll in sporadically and give a blast of an update on my progress. I wish I were more committed, but seem to struggle with regular updates. Where am I now?

My energy is better than it’s been in about eight years! No lie.

What have I done?

  • I think I sorted out my magnesium issue. I’m still unsure how much magnesium I need to be taking. I’m taking about
  • 400-600mg/day. And also use magnesium spray a few times per week.
  • I am taking 5,000-10,000mcg of methyl B-12 daily. This has made a HUGE improvement in energy during the day.
  • I am taking colostrum, of all things. I read that it was great for immune-based issues. I swear this has improved my tolerance with peppers (which used to cause skin issues). I still avoid the best I can. And still have issues with eggs.
  • I’m taking several adaptogens: a few types of ginseng, ginko biloba, ashwagandha, tulsi, rhodiola, cordyceps, theanine. I’m not sure which of these help the most, but I do notice a down-tick in energy and an increase in brain fog when I stop. (I rotate these in an out. Trying not to take a particular one for more than four weeks straight.)
  • I’m taking some anti-inflammatories, including fish oil and marshmallow root
  • I’m also religiously taking a b-complex, trace minerals, iron and vitamin C
  • I have stopped taking vitamin D. And now remind myself to get it, I HAVE to get out in the sunshine. This connection with nature is unlike any pill I can take. Plus, vitamin D supplements allegedly depletes magnesium. So I’m better off getting it the natural way.
  • I’m meditating at least once a day. Sometimes two or three times. This has made such a huge improvement in outlook, stress and anxiety
  • I’m reading several perspective books, including May Cause Miracles and A Course In Miracles. May Cause Miracles does a lot of stuff I’ve heard therapy does. But I do it at my pace.
  • Along with reading and meditating, I’m working to journal every single day. I’ll write for 10 minutes about what I’ve read. Something I noticed that day. An improvement during that day, etc.
  • I’m also much more aware of the negative people in my life. I have avoided those who push buttons. And even called some people out as they’re doing it. Those who aren’t self-aware enough to hear criticism I’ve slowly started limiting my communications with. This is HUGE. You do become the people you spend time with. And I had so many other angry, cynical, negative people around me. To break the cycle, I had to be honest with where I was going. And for those who couldn’t hear that, I had to realize I was better off without them. I don’t want to be a victim in my life. I want to be a participant!

A bit of information on my workouts and weight loss: 

I’m NOT forcing myself to do hard workouts. I’m doing yoga once a week. I’m doing T-Tapp a few times a week. I’m walking when the weather’s nice enough I’m not miserable. I’ve stopped trying to run. And I’ve stopped trying to lift “heavy for me.” I still do weight-based training. But much lower weight. And I do what I can on that day. It’s been important for me to realize all days aren’t created equal. Some days I’m so exhausted, a workout doesn’t help anyone. I know for some people (including past me), pushing a workout when I feel tired was a good thing. Now, though? Being that wiped out is a sign I’ve done enough for the day. I now respect that. I don’t feel guilty for going to bed early. I don’t feel ashamed of “only” working out 2-3 times in a week. I no longer workout while I’m sick. I see so many people saying, “Look at me! I never miss a gym day!” Good for them, honestly! I used to be that person, also. And I used to heal easily enough and recover fine, even when I was sick. Now? If I workout while I’m sick, the sick lingers and lingers and lingers.

I haven’t lost a single pound. I’m still hovering around my highest weight, ever. But my attitude is so much improved. My head is clear (not in a constant fog). And I’m not annoyed being around myself. It’s so hard to explain, but a few years ago, my attitude was frustrating, even to me. You’d think I could have just said, “I’m going to be positive/happy/motivating/encouraging today.” But it really wasn’t possible. I’d say people telling me to “change my mind” is probably similar to the frustration people with depression feel. Clearly, I wasn’t struggling with anything that heavy. I was never suicidal or anything like that. But the heaviness I felt my doctor even tried to diagnose as depression. But it felt more like I was constantly “getting sick” or “short on sleep.” And I was super impatient, and over-reacted to everything. Every little tiny thing was “the straw that broke the camel’s back.” I was intolerant with people who weren’t doing their jobs at work, or drivers who weren’t driving efficiently or being courteous on the road. I was annoyed with shoppers at grocery stores. And with children for crying. I was constantly procrastinating, and I was super-anti-social. I never wanted to be around people. And I felt like I could never get enough quiet or alone time.

But now, I feel refreshed most of the time. I hit the end of the day and it feels heavier than it used to feel when I was in my 20s (where I could go, go, go all the time). But it feels appropriate to get to the end of the day and feel tired. Emotions exhaust me when it’s appropriate. But I feel like I am more resilient to resistance at work. And am more compassionate.

What do I still want?

  • I’d love to lose weight. Don’t get me wrong, not at the cost of losing the progress I’ve made. But I definitely need to lose about 50 pounds. I could stand to lose more, probably. But if I lost around 50, I think it would help with some of the other things.
  • I need to get my blood pressure down. I’m in the 130-140/85-90 range right now. Not dangerous. But headed that way. I assume losing weight and building cardio endurance will help.
  • I’m pretty happy with how I’m eating. But need to get over the last bit of “obsession” over food. I think getting my weight down will help with that naturally, too.
  • I’d love to build up some cardio endurance to run 1 1/2-2 miles once or twice a week. I’d love to do a hard lifting session once a week. Both of these are endurance building in progress. But I’m working toward them. I still get that post-workout fatigue that rolls over me like a haze and lasts 24-36 hours. Leaving me to feel I just need to sleep “a little more” or “might be getting sick.” But I can do yoga (not power yoga, and respecting my heart rate) and T-Tapp with no repercussions. I can also walk a few miles with no issues. And can add in a short, lower intensity weight training session with lighter weights. So it’s better than nothing. I’m starting there and building up!

So I’m very, very pleased with my progress the past six or so months. Very pleased. My attitude and outlook is improved. People have said they see a change in me. My stress level is so low, I’ve started asking people why THEY’RE panicking about something, when I used to be right there with them. I find myself diffusing situations, rather than adding to them. I am more compassionate and see others’ fears rather than being frustrated with their resistance. I’m calmer on the road and at the grocery store. I haven’t regained the religious faith I lost in my late teens/early 20s, but I am working on overall faith in a higher power, outside of religion. Even saying that, I HAVE regained respect for religion in general, rather than resisting and arguing. This is good because so many people I love are religious. Religion just isn’t for me right now. But the tenants of religion are coming back. I realized I can have faith outside of religion, and feel like, for me, part of “growing up” has been finding a spot where I have faith, and feel at home. I’m hopeful to continue to see improvements, even if it’s not immediately in weight, workout endurance, etc. Every step feels like a step in the right direction. I feel like I’m headed where I’m meant to go.

Thought for the day: Everything is in our past Even right this second as I’m typing this. Every word, as I finish it, is in my past. You’re reading something I wrote in the past. And the past shapes how we react right now. Be aware of how the past is shaping your life today. Don’t let that be so. Instead, embrace every moment with wonder and excitement!

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